Men's Milan trends

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The idea of a men’s clutch is certainly on its way to the average professional male, but designers may want to think about choosing a different noun for this one. We’ve gotten so used to our girlfriends’ requests to hold onto their clutch or help them find it after misplacing it in the bar (it’s strapped to your wrist for a reason – how do you always lose it!?). I shudder when I hear the word clutch, and I’m certainly not willing to purchase one. That said, we’re all ready for a trendy ‘folio’ which is compact enough to carry around what’s important.

Dries Van Noten

I hate the high socks look, but there’s some slight potential with short suits, and we have global warming to thank for that. It may take a number of seasons (ask Al Gore just how many), but as corporate conservatives relax and temperatures rise, the traditional suit will need to adapt. The fancy safari outfit on the right side is a different story – that should be saved for…well, a safari, or maybe Jurassic Park 7. Either way, you’ll need to get rid of those leggings.

Left to right: Kris Van Assche for Dior Homme and Givenchy

A working professional can’t get any bolder than this. Major changes to the professional male wardrobe will take years, but there’s always a solid following that is up to the challenge. The ‘following’ exhausted every possible bright pastel color shirt and matching pocket square, they’ve allowed us to wear the double windsor on a daily basis, and they’ve tightened the fit of a suit to prevent us from tripping over our own baggy pants.

The full hot pink on pink doesn’t have a chance, but the white shirt with a loud suit (and matching tie) is a cool concept. I might have to own more than four pairs of dress shoes in order to accomplish the look, but I’d be willing to change it up if the trendsetters could convince my boss that it’s okay.

Left to right: Givenchy and Calvin Klein

I won’t wear it, but I feel empathy for my height-challenged friends; therefore, I support this rising (excuse the pun) look. The heel has been growing for the past few years, and although the pace is a quarter that of women’s shoes, we’re ready to see this one very soon. It will open up the opportunities for those males who’d like to be eye level with someone else, even if it’s just for one night. Tom Cruise, are you paying attention?

Fendi wedge

I hope I don’t see anyone in this sheer pvc outfit anytime soon. It looks like it belongs in a women's closet. Period.

As far as the Alexander Mcqueen swimsuit goes, let’s go back to the basics and categorize men into two general groups: those who wear a bathing suit (or swim trunks) and those who enjoy a speedo:

The bathing suit is designed to be as similar to a pair of shorts as possible. An average guy limits his wardrobe, and finding some trunks which double up as casual shorts – well, that’s often a big win. Further, men have intelligently lengthened their swim wear throughout the generations in order to hide some ‘shortcomings’ in their physique (and I’m not just talking about the obvious). There’s no need to bring that decision back into question.

And then there are men who appreciate the speedo, and there’s an argument that the design in the photo above is just a slight extension; however, let’s not jump to any conclusions. Three key types of people enjoy the smaller suit: the swimmer, the sculpted athlete, and that guy just looking for attention. The swimmer is looking for the best way to eliminate drag in the water, and the fabric ‘choker’ in the photo above doesn’t quite help out with that pursuit. Our athletes also don’t appreciate any unnecessary coverage of the abs that they’ve worked hard for. So, that leaves the attention seeker, and do you really want to be 'that guy'? Maybe if you are as funny as Borat this works, but otherwise, you will end up looking like John Mayor. Do you want to be John Mayor? Well, minus Jennifer Aniston.

So, this I would say is not a trend - this is too much.

McQueen